13 July 2010

Great news!
I have just heard that my latest Angel book has been accepted by my publishers. It is called THE DOG COLLAR MURDERS. It will come out in March 2011, and I am naturally delighted.

I am particularly pleased because everywhere you go, I hear of good, experienced, competent authors stuck with manuscripts in their hands, not knowing which way to turn. The credit strain is battering authors very hard. Money is short. Libraries have had their already mean buying allowance drastically cut back. So orders to publishers aren’t flowing in so readily. Some authors have sold the rights to an email publisher. I am not sure how that works. I understand that the book is never actually printed, and that it is sold on line for a fee, like music. It might eventually be sold to readers who have one of these new IPADs. I think an IPAD is a computer about the size of an A4 sheet of paper and around two inches thick. One side is mostly screen, and I understand that an IPAD can store more books than you could read in a lifetime; also you can do all sorts of clever tricks with it, such as change the font size to make it easier to read, and that sort of thing. The practical and commercial mechanics of ‘publishing’ that way are beyond my comprehension. I hope we are not seeing the end of the published book. After all, there’s nothing like unwrapping a book as a gift … it wouldn’t be the same as unwrapping an internet file as a Christmas present, would it?

Well, we are in the dog days of Summer. I read that the saying comes from the Romans who called the hottest days of the summer, ‘dog days’. They believed that the DOG-STAR (Sirius) rose with the sun, added to its heat and therefore bore the combined heat of both. So it says in Brewer’s Dictionary of Phrase and Fable. It says that the hottest period therefore is from about 3rd July to 11th July. So we have just had it! I must say, it does feel a bit chilly today.

It has been beautiful this last week and I have managed a few walks round the Park. I hope you are able to take advantage of the good weather and get outside and enjoy the fresh air, the green grass and the trees. The bad weather is soon enough with us when we will want to be huddled up inside.

I must get started on my new book. I have a super plot for an Angel book in my mind, but the queen and I have a few domestic jobs to do before I can get started.

Have a nice holiday if you’re going away; if you’re not going away, have a lovely, quiet, unhurried time at home doing whatever you want to do.

Thank you for reading the ramblings of this old writer.
28th June 2010

Oh dear. Oh dear. And it will cost £12m to get rid of the ‘poor’ man. All that money. How much will it cost to keep him, I ask myself? What ever does he live on? Goldfish?

I raced home yesterday afternoon from a twice yearly meeting of the Northern Chapter of the Crime Writers’ Association lunch and meeting hoping I might catch the end of the match on the telly. I needn’t have rushed by all accounts.

The chapter meeting was very interesting and I met up with some old friends including Peter N Walker (of Heartbeat fame) and his dear wife Rhoda. They were both looking younger. Peter was Chairman of the northern chapter for ages.
A hundred years ago when I was shy and struggling, it was Peter who encouraged me to join in branch activities. (Come to think of it, I am still shy and struggling.)

Next years AGM was announced and apparently it is to be in Darlington. Also the junior crime writers’ competition was discussed. This is a national scheme sponsored by the CWA to get young people interested in crime writing at an early age. There have been thousands of entries. Entry forms available at participating public libraries. If you know any young person who wants to get started and can’t get an entry form, email me and I’ll put you in touch with the appropriate library. My email address, as always, is - angeldetective@uwclub.net.

Watch out for publication of my latest Angel book THE SNUFFBOX MURDERS on Wednesday next, 30th June. If you see anything unusual in the sky it could be the rockets.

Come back soon … if you can stand the pace.
7 June 2010

Hi there.

Welcome back. I’ve neglected the diary a bit, I must say. My excuse is that I was busy finishing off with what is possibly my most exciting book. I completed it yesterday and the queen is downstairs proof reading it for me so that I can hopefully I post it off to the publishers tomorrow. It is called THE DOG COLLAR MURDERS. I hope you will think it is Angel at his best.

It is impossible in this life to get through without pain. I should have learned that from when I was five when I had a spanking from my mother with a coat hanger for deliberately setting fire to the white lace bedroom curtains.

Anyway, about two years ago I had terrible toothache. I was in agony. It was at the weekend, and my regular dentist who had been treating me over ten or twelve years was closed. There was a message on his answerphone saying that I should contact the NHS emergency dentist and it gave the number, which I duly rang, many times. However, that phone was always engaged. It must have been off the hook. So, in desperation, I went to the A and E department at the hospital. It was explained to me that while they didn’t have an orthodontics department - I thought that that was the specialist department that dealt with donkeys - the duty doctor would take a look at me. I sat there patiently waiting and wondered if it was possible to give me an antibiotic to get rid of the infection and thereby ease the pain. A few minutes later a 12 year old boy in a white coat came into the cubicle where I had been shunted. He had a look in my mouth and declared that, ‘The gum was a bit red and swollen, but nothing serious,’ and sent me home with 2 co-codamol and advice that I ‘should see a dentist.’

Do you know, writing about this is getting me all worked up, so I’ll skip a few stages and move on.

A friend told me that there was a painless dentist I could go to. A painless dentist? I thought anything to do with teeth had to be painful. I had visions of Bob Hope in that silly film where he was supposed to be ‘Painless Potter’ the travelling dentist touring the Wild West in the 1880’s. He was anything but painless. Anyway I found the man’s name in the phone book, and he had more letters after his name than Idi Amin. Anyway I made an appointment to see him. I had to go private so the cost was enormous. Anyway, to cut the story short, the surgeon extracted the tooth and I didn’t feel a thing. No needles. Just a scratch on the back of the hand. Nothing painful. I slept all the way through it. I had a taxi home and had a painfree snooze through the afternoon. Since then I have had a filling there, no needles, no heavy weapons, utterly painfree, without being anaesthetised.

Last week the same man took out two wisdom teeth and one ordinary tooth. Again no needles. No pain. Slept through the whole operation. It is outrageously expensive, of course, but it is totally without pain and horror.

If you suffer from toothache and you need a dentist, forsake something like a weekend break, or three six month’s booze and go to a painless dentist.

Moving on …
I had a delightful letter from Patricia of Ipswich. I won’t give her name in full in case she is shy. She wrote to me at my publishers, Robert Hale. She says some very kind things about the Angel books. I quote:

‘I love them. They are in plain English, understandable and the best read I’ve had in years.’

She goes on to say that she has read all the titles except one which her library can’t get hold of. It must be MURDER IN BARE FEET, because it is sold out. Although it is no help to Patricia, I am pleased to take this opportunity to remind readers that audio versions of the book were recorded and published in April by Soundings. The actor who made the recording is Jonathan Keeble who also recorded my book, WILD ABOUT HARRY published in 2010. By the way, I have just heard that Hales are reprinting CUCKOO CLOCK SCAM which is excellent news.

Watch out for THE SNUFFBOX MURDERS, which is the 16th Angel book, to be published on June 30th. If you live anywhere near Barnsley in South Yorkshire, watch out for the sky lighting up!

Take care. Back soon.
30 April 2010.

There you are.

Had a great time at the Ladies Group at Emmanuel Hall, Barnsley, on Wednesday night, the 28th. I gave a talk called ‘Writing Your First Book,’ where I tried to inflame the imagination and then have a session writing a piece of narrative. Some of the ladies were very inventive and dived straight into varied and exciting plots. Believe me, gentlemen, the ladies weren’t short of ideas, and there’s probably at least one writer of a best-seller among them!

Would you believe it, for the first time this year, we now have two big vases of beautiful fresh spring flowers in the house… mostly daffodils but some tulips, picked from our own garden? The queen was greatly cheered. There seems to be great satisfaction in growing and picking what you’ve grown, isn’t there?

Hey, we’ve bought a 42” flat screen TV, which is absolutely fabulous. The screen is like a big window and I was brought out my drowsy state the other night when I thought Anthea Turner was coming straight through it into our sitting-room. When I discovered she wasn’t, of course, I went back to dozing.

Still banging away at the book. Hope to finish it soon. I seem to have been writing it forever.

Come back soon if you can tolerate the meanderings of this old writer.
April 25th 2010

Hello there.
There was panic in the Silverwood household yesterday.

It was so beautiful yesterday morning, where we live at the foot of the Pennines, that the queen was inspired to go round the house, look out at the views and open all the windows. Spring is here, she said. Freshen up the house, she said.

Of course, I followed her round closing them. I’m not paying good money out to the gas people to heat up the garden and fields!

Anyway, as a result of that, later that morning, I was in the bathroom getting washed and I reached out to the rim of the sink searching for the towel when I suddenly experienced a pain on my finger. It was a pain to end all pain. It was a pain that I shall not forget. It was like being stabbed in the finger with a hot needle that had an electric element running through it. I naturally pulled it away and an angry wasp fell off the end of it onto the carpet. I chased it round but soon gave up. The pain on my finger was too severe. I dashed to the cabinet, found some iodine and cotton wool, and dabbed round the area. It didn’t seem to make any difference. I went down stairs and showed the queen my finger. By this time it was red and swelling. I told her about the pain and asked her if she had any ideas about what to do to relieve it. She said we should ring NHS Direct. I said no, it wasn’t serious enough to bother them with, but she rang them anyway, then pushed the phone at me. It was a pleasant enough young woman at the other end. I explained that I had been stung by a wasp and asked if there was any quick way she could tell me how to relieve the pain. She said there were some questions she would have to ask me first. I struggled to find out how I could get relief from the pain, but lost, so I held out my throbbing finger and submitted myself to answering a series of irrelevant questions. I thought that she might come up with the advice when she reached the end of them, but no. She was apparently only a clerk, and she said that a nurse would phone me back in about half an hour. She had gone off the phone before I had chance to say that I might be dead by then. Anyway, to be fair, the nurse rang back about ten minutes later. She asked me another load of questions, many the same as the clerk had asked. Then at last I got the information I had been seeking, which was simply to wash my hands thoroughly with soap and water and then gently rub a piece of ice round the inflamed area. I thanked her and rang off. I washed my hands thoroughly although it was painful. I didn’t have any ice in the fridge, but I did have an unopened bag of frozen peas. I didn’t open them, I just put the affected part of my finger onto the bag. I have to admit it was very soothing. After an hour the pain had almost gone leaving a swollen pink area about as big as a postage stamp. This morning there is no pain at all.
I am most grateful to the NHS.

On somethings entirely different …

I am speaking to the Young Wives Group about ‘Writing your first book,’ at Emmanuel Hall, Huddersfield Road, Barnsley, at 7.30 pm on Wednesday evening next, April 28th. If you want to join in, please come along. Admission is free.

I am still working away at my new book for October or so this year. But my next Angel book out is THE SNUFFBOX MURDERS on June 16th 2010.

Come back soon if you can put up with more ramblings from this old writer.
Thursday 25th March 2010

There you are.

Terrific news. I have just heard that THE CUCKOO CLOCK SCAM, published on the 30th September 2009 is already out of print. That means on the one hand that sales have rocketed (which, of course, I am ecstatic about), but it also mean that latecomers won’t get a copy, as it will be impossible to persuade my publisher to reprint it in this financial climate. (It took 31 years to get a reprint of my first book, DEADLY DAFFODILS!)

Incidentally, the real daffs in our garden have arrived! The gold colour from my study window cuts through the mist, lightens the gloom and cheers me up. I thought we’d lost them all in the big freeze. Thank goodness for some normality.

Of course the winter just past is how winters used to be. I suppose if you’re under 20, you will think it unusual. I remember being caught in Aberdeen in 1962 and having to spend the weekend there because the roads were impassable and the trains had stopped running.

Moving on …
I received a cosy letter from the gas people telling they want more money. MORE MONEY! There is a subtle hint in the small print if you look hard for it that had me dashing off to read the meter.
The gas companies don’t read meters anymore. They haven’t time. They are too busy adjusting price lists upwards. Besides that, reading meters is a dirty, cold unsociable job … creeping round houses, knocking on doors, waiting for folks to answer. So many people out at work … nobody in all day, so that the reader has to call back in the evening. Can’t do that.
Anyway, I phoned the actual meter reading through to the sugar tonsilled lady at the gas company and she lowered the bill. Just like that.

I frequently mention in the books that Angel is worried about paying the gas bill. I would be interested to hear what you think about today’s gas prices (or anything else). The address is angeldetective@uwclub.net. If you write anything interesting, I might mention it here on the diary.

I heard the Chancellor of the Exchequer say he was making plans to make it easy for everybody to have a bank account. (Presumably as the first stage in organising a new way of taking money off us).
And I was thinking, doesn’t he know it’s always been easy to open a bank account? The only requirement was that you had to have money, the more the better. If you hadn’t any or much, there wasn’t much point and you might have been turned away.
Anyway, millions of people still don’t want a bank account and pay their bills at the Post Office. They trust the Post Office. But the government wants to close down the Post Offices that everybody trusts and move the business to the banks that nobody trusts!

Is there any hope for commonsense?

Still hacking away at the Angel book. It’s taking shape now. It should be finished in about six weeks. It is proving quite a marathon, but I am writing carefully. I want Angel fans to enjoy it and get their money’s worth. This will be the 17th Angel book. My next Angel book out is THE SNUFFBOX MURDERS on June 16th 2010.

Come back soon if you can put up with more ramblings from this old writer.
Tuesday, March 16th 2010

Well hello there. Welcome back.

The temperature today in sunny South Yorkshire is forecast to be 15C. Isn’t that fantabulous? I may soon have no excuse at all for not walking round the Park. My main reason this year has been the atrocious weather, and the need to work at my new Angel book.

It was a heavy fall of snow overnight that prevented some members, me included, from attending the Crime Writers’ Association Northern Branch dinner and conference last month. Meeting up with fellow writers and old friends, enables us to compare notes, talk about publishers and generally beef about everything to do with writing crime. That companionship is valuable and I missed it. The next one is in October, I will have to wait until then to recharge my battery.

We have a dear lady, Elaine, who looks after the queen and me. She keeps the dust out of mouths, prepares meals and generally does everything. She planned to go away for a week’s holiday recently which was fine, although I wondered how we would manage. Anyway, Elaine said that her elder daughter, Sharon, could come in for a few hours and keep us tidy and organised while she was away, if we would like. The queen and I were very grateful and gladly agreed to the idea. So Elaine went off on her holiday with her younger daughter Sheree to Italy, and Sharon duly arrived that Monday morning and did her stuff. Although Elaine was a thousand miles away in a foreign country, (‘Bonjourno,’ to all my Italian readers, by the by), apparently she was in regular contact by ‘text’ with Sharon. And Sharon, who I thought was a darling, looked after us admirably, and everything seemed to go all right.
However, when Elaine returned, among many other things she showed me a text that Sharon had sent to her after the first day coming here. It read, ‘I could throttle Mr Silverwood. He complains so much.’
Naturally I wasn’t pleased, but I made light of it.
Then later Sharon came round to show me the text her mother had sent to her from Italy in reply. It read, ‘Yes. He moans. Take no notice.’
‘He moans. Take no notice.’ Me! I didn’t know what to say. I denied it categorically, of course. Everybody who knows me, knows that I am as easy as an old boot. Women!

Of course I have been hammering away on my computer at my new book which is something of a tussle. (It’s like marriage. It gets harder as you go along.) Getting the characters believable, Angel’s wit as sharp as I can make it and a plot that is both original and exciting is no mean task for Angel’s 17th outing. It will still be some weeks before I finish it. I hope readers will think it’s all been worth waiting for.

Meanwhile, THE SNUFFBOX MURDERS will be published in July and will be the 16th Angel book.

And while writing, I am pleased to advise that the audio rights in SHRINE TO MURDER have been sold to Isis, so that the blind can hear it recorded by Jonathan Keeble on disc or cassette. They will be ready in April.

Also, the large print rights in WILD ABOUT HARRY have been sold to Thorpes and will be published in April. Thorpes have published my other Angel books, which is super.

I think that's about all I can think of for now. Now I must find my walking boots and stick.

Take care and come back soon.